i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
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