Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
