Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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