How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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