pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
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