"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
