You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
