the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize