Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
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