on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I woke up under a house in Key West
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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