9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
