dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
