So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
