This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
All I want is dick and wine.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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