You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
