I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
