East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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