What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
