Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize