you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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