Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
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