it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
