It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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