if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
