More tranny stories later!
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
