Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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