I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
