My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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