Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
