What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
