I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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