He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize