I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
