can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
