if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official drugs can't kill me
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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