My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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