Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
