: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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