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• (208): View more from Idaho

  He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  he told me I talked like a deaf person

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  This house was built for laser tag.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.

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  21 Reasons You’ll Be Forever Alone

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (415): View more from California

  The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.

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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby

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  23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (607): View more from New York

  I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan

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• (310): View more from California

  How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though

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