See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
