no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Randomize
