I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize