There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
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good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
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Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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