i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
