Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
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