I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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