When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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