Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
