i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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