It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
