We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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